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Moving beyond the cliché Valentine

valentinesdayBy AMANDA BINIECKI,
Staff Writer

It seems spontaneity has died alongside chivalry. Valentine’s Day is an anticipated bore; most can expect the typical flowers and candy. Dinner and a movie will ensue.

Mention the term “romance” in passing and many men tuck tail and run. In defense, some will say romance comes with a hefty price tag. This, however, is not true. Romance by definition is the excited feeling of mystery associated with love.

Women are not looking for the bromidic romance seen on television. What they really want is sentiment. Don’t underestimate the power of the monologue. Break it down; spell it out — your feelings, expectations and plans for the future. We want to hear it. We want to be reminded often that our relationship is treasured, revered and enduring.

Trouble expressing your feelings, you say? This is a common distinction between men and women. Men often find it difficult to express what they are feeling. So, write a love letter. It is much easier to articulate exactly what it is you want to communicate without stumbling over words or feeling foolish.

Make a scrapbook or collage of moments in your life together. Why not try making an old-fashioned, handmade Valentine card? Please do not adapt the old, “roses are red, violets are blue” poem on it.

Try a scavenger hunt with a twist. Use clues from events in your past, leading to the where you met or some other significant location. Then wait for her to find you. Note: Do not make the clues too difficult to figure out, or you just might get the impression that you have been stood up.

If purchasing a gift is more your style, put some thought into it. Buy something unexpected, not necessarily expensive jewelry (unless your budget allows for such extravagances). Try the first edition of her favorite book, for example, or something that better reflects who she is.

If you just can’t break out of old cliché habits, make it worthwhile. Plan an indoor picnic. Throw a sheet on the floor and set the ambiance with candles and wine glasses. Serve finger foods that you can feed to one another.

Above all, remember it’s not the amount of money spent that will make the evening special and no one other than yourself is better equipped to know what the perfect Valentine for your special someone is. Use a little panache and make this year distinctive.

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